ramblings of the mc

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i have been sick for the last 3 days.
this is good. and this is bad.

good because i haven’t been to the office in 3 days, which in and of itself is a reason to make me want to feel better. but i know that if i start feeling better, i have to go to work, and that appeals to me none whatsoever. also good because whenever i am sick i end up reading a lot. (this time it has been “the green mile” by stephen king. i love the way he writes. he says things in a way that makes you uncomfortable because he hits a little too close to the way you really feel.) and reading a lot always makes me end up writing. last night it was 3am when i spilled my self onto paper. my intentions are to actually keep up a blog from this point forward, but you know how that goes.

here is a question i have about being sick: is it real? i know that’s a weird question, but think about it. you always hear about the terminally ill giving up their will to live or perhaps being too strong to die. if you can have that kind of power over something as serious as cancer, what is it that makes the flu so crippling?  maybe it’s exactly what i was alluding to earlier: we feel the need to be sick as a resort from the daily grind of life. and so, because things have gotten too normal, we allow a wrench to be thrown in our proverbial clockwork to upset the whole flow of things. and it works to perfection every time. we arise from a newly shaken illness feeling fresh and alive and good, even if only for a moment. i don’t think we do this consciously, really. and maybe a small illness is inevitable. but maybe, just maybe, we allow that cold to take us over in hopes that we can find a glimmer of light at the end of our diseased tunnel.

you know, i’m feeling better…